Do you want to find new and fun activities to keep things interesting?
Do you want to get to know one another better, and grow together in your relationship?
Do you want to feel close and connected even though you are miles apart?
This series of fun and thoughtful dates gives you a process and tools to do this.
“Your work is great. I’ve enjoyed it immensely, and really think you have something special.”
(Kate Brauer-Bell, author of The Long Distance Relationship Survival Guide)
What People Are Saying
“We have had some great discussions, and relationship building because of this book.”D.K.A.
“So effective! We both enjoy soul-digging activities and I’m quite positive it will benefit our distance relationship!”Sara L.
“Some good questions, some I never would have thought to ask. I like how it was divided into sections and how she explained the purpose of each section.”
Mr. HoneyBunny (Amazon Reviewer)
Why I Wrote This Book
Making it or breaking it? The key difference between couples.
A couple of years after I launched this website, I started to notice a pattern—a difference between the couples whose time long distance has overall made them stronger and closer, and the couples whose time apart has badly damaged or broken their relationship.
That difference lay in the quality and depth of the conversations they were having.
The couples who were growing closer and stronger during their long distance relationship were consistently prioritizing communication. They were finding a way to connect for at least one, extended, unhurried conversation every week. They were spending time, every week, asking and answering questions that helped them learn new things and communicate deeply.
Many of the couples who were struggling (or parting ways) during their long distance relationship were not doing this. They may have been in touch frequently—even daily—but most of their exchanges remained at a more superficial level. They talked a lot about the trivia of their day, and how much they missed each other, but didn’t have the sorts of conversations that could help them get to know each other at a deeper level and learn more about each other’s values, personality, and approach to life.
When this pattern started to emerge, I knew how I could help.
I could take my experience and training as a psychologist and choose and explain topics that would help build up relationships. I could take my years of experience leading workshops on stress, resilience, and communication skills, and design a process and ask questions that would help people connect and learn. I could take my award-winning writing skills and put this all together in a book.
So that’s what I did.
About The Long Distance Dating Blueprint
The Long Distance Dating Blueprint is a 12-week series of “dates” that will guide you into important, interesting, and intimate conversations. Along the way, it gives you tools and uncovers insights that will strengthen and deepen your relationship, even while you live far apart.
- Learn about each other’s strengths, sense of humor, communication style, and personality.
- Discover brand-new insights about yourself and your partner (yes, no matter how long you’ve been together).
- Do fun and fascinating positive psychology activities together that have been proven to make people happier and healthier.
In other words… if you do the Long Distance Dating Blueprint you will likely emerge better off as individuals and as a couple. As the icing on the cake, you will have fun along the way.
How it works
The Blueprint will help you explore and learn about personal strengths, sense of humor, communication styles, adventure-seeking, personality, and a number of different practices proven to make you happier and healthier (such as gratitude).
Each of the 12 chapters contains some background information (strictly interesting stuff, I promise). Then I tell you about your task for the week and share lots of discussion prompts, questions, and other tips you can use during your date.
What we cover
Here’s a look at the topics we cover, and just some of the questions we will answer together.
[Week 1] Name Your Strengths: What are your strengths? You have more strengths than you might think—probably more than you know. This week we begin the process of identifying your personal strengths and labeling them.
[Week 2] Explore Your Strengths: How do your strengths work together in your relationship? We use a questionnaire to explore your strengths profile in more detail. You share your signature strengths with each other and explore how those strengths can complement each other.
[Week 3] Share Something Funny: How important is it for couples to find the same things funny? This week we explore sense of humor “compatibility” and look at when having a different sense of humor can cause big problems in a relationship. You share things you find funny.
[Week 4] Learn To Speak The Language Of Love: What is your love language? We use a questionnaire to identify your primary love language(s), identify your similarities and differences, and look at ways to speak different love languages well in a long distance relationship.
[Week 5] Go On An Adventure: Why is trying new things good for us? We will learn why trying new things can make us happier and is good for our relationships. You go on an adventure in your own city and talk about how you embrace novelty and adventure in your life.
[Week 6] Lit Pick For Two: We explore how you like to spend your free time, and how and why reading is good for you and your relationship. You both read the same book, story, or comic book, and talk it over.
[Week 7] Let’s Get Personal(ity): What is your personality? What is your partner’s? We look at whether opposites really attract, and what the best formula is for a happy couple. You use a questionnaire to identify your personality type and discuss your profile.
[Week 8] Be Grateful For The Good: Did you know some call gratitude the world’s most powerful habit? We look at how gratitude makes us happier and healthier. You practice a gratitude exercise and discuss how you experience gratitude in your life.
[Week 9] Send A Care Package: You learn about the fascinating origins of CARE packages and send a care package to your partner. You will talk about gift giving in your family, and how that has shaped your expectations and hopes around gifts and holidays now.
[Week 10] Treat Yourself: We learn about the benefits of savoring, and how positive emotions do more than just make us feel good. You treat yourself to something(s) you enjoy by designing a beautiful day out.
[Week 11] Give To Others: How does giving make us happier and healthier? We learn four surprising ways that giving is good for us and 22 good ways to give to others. You perform some random acts of kindness and discuss generosity.
[Week 12] Choose Your Own Adventure: We take a look backwards, and forwards. You choose your favorite topic to delve deeper in, and talk together about the key things you’ve learned during this series and what comes next.
FREE BONUS: The Blueprint Journal
Your personal workbook…
To help you get the most out of this series, I’ve designed a special companion journal to go with it.
The Blueprint Journal is your 32-page personal workbook for this series. It guides you through the reflection questions, discussion questions, and tasks for each week, with plenty of space for you to make notes and keep track of your answers and insights.
Printing it out and using it is the best way to make sure you will get real and lasting benefits from doing The Long Distance Dating Blueprint, and it’s yours free when you buy the Blueprint.