I have been running a website for couples in long distance relationships for more than four years now, and I’ve come to learn there are several things that almost everyone in a LDR wants:
You want to…
Find new and fun things to do together to keep things interesting.
Get to know one another better and grow together in your relationship.
Feel close and connected even though you are miles apart.
Can you really grow closer when you’re in a long distance relationship?
Some people say that it’s just not possible to really grow in your relationship when you’re apart.
These naysayers believe that if your relationship is long distance you are, at best, just treading water until you can spend time together face to face.
I don’t believe that for a second.
Sure, being long distance makes some things harder and certain things impossible (like getting a hug right when you most want one). But I actually believe that being in a long distance relationship for a season can be good for you, and good for your relationship!
The habit that makes all the difference
A couple of years ago I started to notice a pattern—a difference between the couples whose time long distance has made them stronger and closer, and the couples who would say the opposite.
The couples I’ve seen who have grown closer and stronger as a result of long distance have all prioritized communication and found a way to connect for at least one extended, high-quality-time, conversation every week.
What do I mean by “high-quality-time”? I mean a leisurely discussion of at least 45 minutes where these couples go beyond the immediate “this happened today” sort of chatter and, instead, ask and answer questions that help them go deeper and discover new things about each other.
The couples I know who have struggled most (or parted ways) because of long distance haven’t done this. They may have had frequent contact—even daily—but most of their exchanges have remained at a more superficial level. They have talked a lot about the trivia of their day and how much they miss each other, but have neglected conversations that help them get to know each other at a deeper level and learn more about each other’s values, personality, and general approach to life.
In other words, you can have a lot of contact when you’re in a long distance relationship, but if you’re not making time to talk about deeper things it’s not helping move your relationship forward.
Which couple are you?
I’d love you to pause for a moment and think about this.
Which couple are you now—the couple who makes time at least once a week for a deeper, unhurried conversation or the couple who doesn’t?
Which couple do you want to be?
I’ve got something for you this week—a process and tools to help you become the couple who makes that time at least once a week to connect deeply and grow together.
The Long Distance Dating Blueprint
The Long Distance Dating Blueprint is some of the best material I’ve ever produced. I’m so excited to share it with you this week as it launches today with a special 3-day-only discount of 40%.
If you want to grab a copy click the link below and enter the code LAUNCH after you click the BUY button:[And, by the way, the code LAUNCH will save you 40% on the Blueprint OR the Great Dates Bundle–which contains the Blueprint and journal, plus my most popular book, 401 Great Discussions Questions For Couples–but only for the next 3 days]